What I Learned On My Blind Date

1) I will never again trust my Institute teacher (when it involves getting set-up on a date). He was nice, and I had a good time, but very much not compatible with me. My height, at least 30 years old if not older, divorced with 2 kids, no hair, skinny build not weighing more than 120, leaving me self-consciously feeling like a COW! yeah.....Ok, I must sound very shallow, sorry. Maybe I should just not go on any more blind dates. Yes that is the lesson learned.

2) We ate at Village Inn and I discovered I like my eggs "basted", and next time I go out to eat and I'm asked, "How would you like your eggs?" I can confidently reply, "Basted please".
If you are like me, I did not know this was the proper term for it. I'd heard of "scrambled" and "sunny side up" before but not "basted". This is when the egg is cooked through but you can pop yolk part and it's juicy! Hooray for basted eggs!

I want my five dollars!

Next time you want to insult someone, all you need to do is say:
"Do you have the IQ of a Wendy's cashier?!"

Of course there is a story behind this. And no offense to Wendy's cashiers, really.

One day I felt like a big, fat, "Baconator" (yes, I certainly regretted it later). I don't know why but it sounded really good at the time. My buddy at work who kindly gave me a ride waited outside while I ran in to order for myself and also another co-worker.

I order my Baconbeastburger and it comes to a lofty $6.77. I hand the lady $11 (because I wanted a five dollar bill back and not a bunch of ones) and tell her, "One sec--I think I've got the 77 cents..." She already punched it into the register thinking I was going to hand her 77 cents, but when I realize I am one penny short, I hand her 85 cents instead (I know, that probably doesn't make sense but read on). So remember, total was $6.77 and I just gave her $11.85. How much change am I supposed to get back? Ah, that is the magic question. She looks at me blankly because I have obviously thrown her off.

Uhh....So being the math genious that I am, as my face begins to flush because there are people around and I am forced to figure out the difference myself when it's totally not even my job! Sheesh. I count off on my fingers quietly: 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85! Then say, "Ok, you owe me 8 cents. Well, I gave you $11 so actually $5.08. Blank-staring-cashier continues to blank-stare back at me, not quite following. I repeat how it worked out that way and she hands me 8 cents. Anxious to get out of there, I grab my Barfinator and my co-worker's order (which turned out to be the 99 cent chicken sandwich when I asked for the Chicken Club Deluxe...no wonder it turned out to be so much cheaper than mine!), drop my nickel and 3 pennies into my change pocket, and stuff my co-workers change in the other pocket.

I get in the car and it dawns on me that she never gave me my $5, only the 8 cents! Blast. So i go back in and I'm like: "Hi, me again. Um, I gave you $11 and should have gotten a five back but only got the 8 cents." She looks confused (again) and then says to me "Are you sure 5? Not 4?" I'm thinking "Wow. Are you kidding me?! Even I can figure this out." After breaking it down yet again, she finally gets the manager to open the till so she can hand me my change. True story.

I wonder, do they not train people for cashier jobs anymore? Do they not understand how to count back change? Having been a cashier myself, I hated when people did this to me because it threw me off, but counting back the change lessened the chances of my till being off at the end of the night.

So remember dear friends, next time you go to Wendy's just hand over the debit card and this will save everyone in the long run (the cashier's already limited brain function, and your time/money).

Closer To Love...

This is Mat Kearney. Yes, I took this picture. He opened for Keane and we were on the fourth row. Heaven. We made eye contact but I sheepishly looked away. He probably wanted to get my number too but I'm sure he was tired so he didn't stick around till Keane was over. Anyway, his first album was fabbitty-fab (Nothing Left To Lose) and his latest is even better (City of Black & White). He joked that he never expected to have his songs picked as background music for shows featuring Doctors making-out (Grey's Anatomy? I have no idea, I don't watch TV.) If you like Coldplay, pretty sure you'll like the MK. Check out www.matkearney.com. He's got a blog with vids of him on tour this year. Also, for a free download (before June 2nd) check out the Borders website for the single, "Closer to Love". Catchy! :)

Why I Love BB&B

If you have been reading this blog lately, you realize I have been invited to a good share of weddings over the years. The most common places couples seem to register are Target and Bed Bath & Beyond. Personally I go for BB&B, not only because there is one fairly close to my house but because it is just awesome.

This is why I love Bed Bath & Beyond.

*They mail out 20% coupons often. That's right, I can get a discount on ANY item I want! It would be substantially cooler if I actually had the coupon with me when going there...but still, fantastic!

*They have really cool stuff. For instance, Miracle Foot Cream. One day I will buy this and try it. My feet could use a miracle...hmm.... Oh! They have massage chairs! Probably not as good as the real thing but it's free and free rocks! Also there was one of those music things that plays samples of the chill-out/meditation/spa/relaxing music cds. Definitely cool.

*They've got some AMAZINGLY GORGEOUS plates. Wow. I am going to have a hard time deciding which ones I like best when I get to register there someday...

*Probably my most favorite part about BB&B though is that they WRAP the gift for FREE-99! Bargain! I know, I am so tacky-cheap huh....but it is so convenient for me and extra advertising for them so obviously a BRILLIANT idea whoever thought of that one!

Maybe I ought to get a part time job there.....

Trax

Monday thru Friday mornings I hop onto the Trax for my 18 minute ride to work. Public transportation ain't all that bad, really. This is why:

*I get a free pass so I get to save TONS of money which means that one day soon I may just have myself a sweet ride.

*I get to read books (currently...never thought I would say this, but yes, the Twilight series).

*I get to listen to my ipod (My fave right now is the new Mat Kearney cd and I LOVE it! Good stuff.

*I don't have to deal with stupid drivers.

*Wierd people talk to me. Like the one time a jolly lady (whom I might add was much too energetic at 7:30 am...) plopped herself in front of me and excitedly asked "Hi! Do you want to read my English paper?!" Okay...What was I supposed to say? "Sure!" As I skim through the one page paper that appears has been copied and pasted from Google she continues to babble random stuff about how "happiness is mathematically correct" or something like that. Right-o. Um...is it my stop yet?

*I get to witness bizarre human behavior. One day while at a stop, I gazed out the window and noticed a 30-ish year old man standing next to a garbage bin on the platform. He was enjoying his last sips of his Pepsi. Next thing I know, he is reaching INTO the garbage bin, and he pulls out another plastic Pepsi bottle with a good 2 or 3 oz left in it. He contentedly guzzles it down. I'm serious. I saw it with my own two eyes, my contacts were in so it was very clear, and it was early, but I wasn't hallucinating.

There ya go. Public transportation puts a smile on my face.